Q: What occupies the last 6 pages of the Lada User's Manual?
A: The bus and train timetables.
Q: What do you call a Lada on a hill?
A: A bloody miracle.
Q: Why did Stalin wear knee boots while Lenin's were much shorter?
A: Because during Lenin's time, Russia was polluted only up to ankle.
Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Russia?
A: He couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin.