Three Generations of Royal Wedding

1947 (The then) Princess Elizabeth & Lieutenant Philip Mountbatten. 

1981 Prince Charles & Lady Diana Spencer.

2011 Prince William, Duke of Cambridge, & Catherine Middleton.

6 Phases of Work

Phase 1

You are listening to jazz -- Your first day at work is great. Your coworkers are wonderful, your cubicle is cute, and your boss is the best!

Phase 2

You are listening to pop music -- After a while you are so busy that you are not sure if you're coming or going anymore.

Phase 3

You are listening to heavy metal -- This is what you feel like at month end.

Phase 4

You are listening to hip hop -- You become bloated due to stress, feel sluggish and suffer from constipation. Your coworkers are too cheerful for your liking and the walls of your cubicle are closing in. You have started thinking 'WHATEVER' about your boss.

Phase 5

You are listening to GANGSTA RAP -- After more time passes, your eyes start to twitch, you forget what a 'good hair day' feels like as you just fall out of bed and load up on caffeine.

Phase 6

You are listening to the voices in your head -- You have build a makeshift door on your cubicle to keep people out, You have a dartboard with your bosses picture on it in your cube. You wonder why you are even here in the first place.

Horrible celebrity tattoos

Ryan Cabrera's Ryan Gosling.

ke$sha's suck it.

Scarlett Johansson's horse shoe.

Lindsay Lohan's red triangle
and "what dreams may come".

Cheryl Cole's roses.

Harry Styles' butterfly on the stomach.

Painful at one moment

Beautiful one moment

Top Ten Truthful Caddies

#10

Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake."

Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long?"

#9

Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."

Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth."

#8

Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"

Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

#7

Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"

Caddy: "Eventually."

#6

Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."

Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence."

#5

Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of a

distraction."

Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass."

#4

Golfer: "How do you like my game?"

Caddy: "Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf."

#3

Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?

Caddy: "The way you play, sir, it's a sin on any day."

#2

Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."

Caddy: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago."

and the #1 best caddy comment:

Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."

Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."

by Rodger K. Middleton, B.A.

Some interesting movie facts

Source: Maxzz

Bill Gates' bank loan

Happy birthday, Mr. Jobs!

Action kitty

Ralph's baloon

A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday.

They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Oh, no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.

His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"

"She's in the Ladies' Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"

Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book.

The cab driver turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave."

Life journey

A Tale of Two Cows

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM. You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION. You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION. You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called 'Cowkimon' and market them worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION. You have two cows. Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION. You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION. You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment and high bovine productivity. You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at 0.06 per lit. Then midway you raised the price to 0.60 or you cut supply. When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want 1.20. The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows. Your two cows retire together with the PM.

A SINGAPOREAN CORPORATION. You have two cows: One "cow-peh" and one "cow-bu". Both are owned by a government linked corporation.

Desperate time needs desperate measure...

Why me??

Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of AIDS which he got due to infected blood he received during a heart surgery in 1983.
From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: "Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease"?

To this Arthur Ashe replied:
"The world over -- 50 million children start playing tennis, 5 million learn to play tennis, 500,000 learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, when I was holding a cup I never asked GOD "Why me?".
And today in pain I should not be asking GOD "Why me?"

"Happiness keeps you sweet, trials keep you strong, and sorrow keeps you human, failure keeps you humble and success keeps you glowing. But only faith and attitude keeps you going....."

Scream of poo

Source: guggaosk99

Where mermaids come from

Clever, Interesting, and Funny tattoos

Batman dad

Hatch put dads' rights in the headlines by perching near Buckingham Palace's balcony dressed as Batman. Read the complete article here.


fathers-4-justice.org

Scream of the poop