Lolcat staff

Two tomatoes were walking together, when one started to lag behind. The other one squashed it and said "ketchup!"

A pirate walks into a bar. He has a ship's wheel tucked into his pants.
The bartender says: "Is that a ship's wheel in your pants?"
And the pirate says: "Arrrrrrrrr it's drivin' me nuts!"

Jungle Jim

Help, hotdogs

You have my permission to go

Man's best man

Don't make me come down there

The dog started it

Cat out of the bag

Canadian dish

Action kitty

No dream's too big